When I was 6 years old, my mom bought me a goldfish, his name was King. Some weeks after King arrived we decided to give him some friends, so I ended up with an aquarium with ~15 fish.

我六歲的時候，我媽媽給我買了條金魚，取名叫國王。國王來了幾周后，我們決定給他添幾個朋友，所以后來我的魚缸里有差不多15條魚。

Every month, one or two fish would die and my mom used to replace them with new ones. After 3 years I lost interest on the aquarium, and my mom stopped buying new fish. The only fish remaining was King, he lived for 3 years!

每個月都有一兩條魚死掉，而我媽媽一般都是用新的魚來替換它們。三年之后我對那個魚缸沒了興趣，然后我媽媽也沒有再買新的魚了。最后活下來的魚只有國王，他活了3年！

Five years ago, when I was 18, I was telling to a friend how long my goldfish stayed with us, when my mom interrupted me and told me the truth: "son, your fish didn't live for 3 years, I've replaced him every time he died and you never noticed it".

五年前，那時候我18歲，我告訴一個朋友我的金魚陪了我們多長時間，這時我媽媽打斷了我，告訴我真相：“兒砸，你的魚沒活過三年，每次他一死掉我就換掉他，而你從沒發(fā)現(xiàn)。”

My mother is creative when it comes to deceiving.

我媽媽要騙人的時候總是不按常理出牌。

'If you don't dry yourself properly after showering, your body hair is going to grow out making you look like a furry bear'

“如果你洗完澡后不擦干自己，你的體毛會一直長，讓你看起來像一只毛茸茸的熊。”

She dropped this on a 4 year old me. The image of looking like a bear scared the living day lights out of me.

這是我四歲時她告訴我的。我每天都會想象自己看起來像只熊的樣子，非常驚恐，覺得暗無天日。

Her concept was simple, the way you water plants and they grow, similarly you water your body and if you don't dry, your hair grows.

她的理論很簡單，你給植物澆水，然后他們就會長大，你給身體澆水也一樣，如果你不擦干，你的體毛就會長長。

Well played maa, well played!

干（sang）得（xin）漂（bing）亮（kuang），媽媽！

When I was little my Dad told me that pressing the button on the handbrake would make the car fly and that he only used it under duress as it was very very dangerous.

我還很小的時候，我爸爸告訴我，按一下手閘上的按鈕，汽車就會飛起來，而他只會在情況非常非常危急時才會使用。

Back then I half knew he was teasing but now, when I am stuck in awful traffic, I gently graze the button and tell myself it's always there for me in case I need to deploy it as a very last resort.

那時我差不多就知道他在逗我玩，但是現(xiàn)在，當我受困于糟糕的交通時，我會輕輕蹭那個按鈕，告訴自己這個按鈕一直都在，就算有什么萬一，我也有它作為最終手段。