外國經(jīng)典幽默笑話
笑話是一種增強(qiáng)快樂的文化，常常以篇幅短小，故事情節(jié)簡單，文筆巧妙的形式出現(xiàn)，給人以出乎意料，并且取得笑意的藝術(shù)效果的文化。在忙碌的生活，我們也需要偶爾的放松一下自己。下面陽光網(wǎng)小編為大家?guī)硗鈬?jīng)典幽默笑話四則，希望大家喜歡!
外國經(jīng)典幽默笑話：考驗(yàn)
The Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD)，the FBI，and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.
洛杉磯警察局、聯(lián)邦調(diào)查局和中央情報(bào)局都在盡力證明他們在抓捕罪犯方面是最好的�？偨y(tǒng)決定考驗(yàn)他們一次。他往森林里放了一只兔子，每一方都得抓住它。
The C1A goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigation they conclude that rabbits do not exist.
中央情報(bào)局進(jìn)了森林。他們在森林里布滿了動(dòng)物密探，他們質(zhì)問所有的植物和礦石目擊者。進(jìn)行了三個(gè)月的廣泛調(diào)查之后，他們宣布兔子根本不存在。
The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest，killing everything in it，including the rabbit, and they make no apologies.
聯(lián)邦調(diào)查局進(jìn)人了森林。兩個(gè)星期后仍然沒有進(jìn)展，最后他們燒了森林，殺死了里面所有的一切，包括那只兔子，并且他們沒有為此而道歉。
The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling, "Okay! Okay! I am a rabbit! I am a rabbit!”
洛杉磯警察局進(jìn)人了森林。兩個(gè)小時(shí)后他們帶著一只被打得遍體鱗傷的黑熊走出來。這只熊喊著:“好吧，好吧!我是只兔子!我是只兔子!”
外國經(jīng)典幽默笑話：我的房間在哪
A deaf couple checks into a motel very late at night. Upon moving into their assigned room, they go to bed. But in the middle of the night, the woman has a headache，so she goes into the bathroom for aspirin. But she finds none，and remembers that the bottle of aspirin is still in the car. Afraid to go out alone at night, she awakens her husband and asks him to go and get the aspirin from the car. The very groggy husband puts on his robe and toddles wearily outside. He finds the bottle of aspirin in the car's glove compartment, and gets ready to go back to the room when he realizes something: he can’t remember which room was his
一對耳聾的夫婦在深夜住進(jìn)了一間汽車旅館。一進(jìn)了定好的房間他們就躺下睡了。但等到半夜，妻子覺得頭疼，于是就到衛(wèi)生間找阿司匹林。可是她沒有找到，這時(shí)她想起來在車上還有一瓶。她不敢深夜獨(dú)自出去，于是就叫醒她的.丈夫，讓他出去從車上拿那瓶阿司匹林。晃晃悠悠的丈夫穿上睡袍，東倒西歪地走出門外。他在汽車儀表盤的貯物箱里找到了阿司匹林，當(dāng)他準(zhǔn)備回房間時(shí)，他想不起來到底哪間才是他的房間。
He thinks and thinks and then gets an idea. He opens the car again and honks the steering wheel horn several times. Within a minute，all the motel’s windows lighten up--except one window, and of course, he makes for the room with that window.
他想來想去，最后想出了一個(gè)主意。他打開車門然后按起了喇叭。不到一分鐘，整個(gè)汽車旅館里除了一間還黑著燈，所有的窗戶都亮了。當(dāng)然，因此他找到了自己的房間。
外國經(jīng)典幽默笑話：只聽上帝的安排
A man walks along a lonely beach. Suddenly he hears a deep voice: DIG!
一個(gè)男人孤獨(dú)的在海灘上散步。突然他聽到一個(gè)低沉的聲音:“挖!”
He looks around: nobody's there. I am having hallucinations, he thinks. Then he hears the voice again: I SAID, DIG!
他環(huán)顧周圍一個(gè)人都沒有。他認(rèn)為他一定是產(chǎn)生了幻覺。然后，他又聽到了那個(gè)聲音:“我說，挖!”
So he starts to dig in the sand with his bare hands，and after some inches, he finds a small chest with a rusty lock.
于是，他開始用雙手在沙地上挖，挖了幾英寸后他發(fā)現(xiàn)了一個(gè)小箱子，上面還有一把生銹的鎖。
The deep voice says: OPEN!
那個(gè)低沉的聲音說:“打開!”
0k，the man thinks, let’s open the thing. He finds a rock with which to destroy the lock , and when the chest is finally open , he sees a lot of gold coins.
那個(gè)男人決定把那個(gè)箱子打開。他找到一塊石頭敲開了鎖。當(dāng)箱子打開時(shí)他看到里面全是金幣。
The deep voice says: TO THE CASINO!
那個(gè)低沉的聲音說:“去賭場!”
Well the casino is only a few miles away, so the man takes the chest and walks to the casino.
那個(gè)男人一想賭場只有幾英里遠(yuǎn)，于是就帶著那個(gè)箱子去了賭場。
The deep voice says: ROULETTE !
那個(gè)低沉的聲音說:“輪盤賭!”
So he changes all the gold into a huge pile of roulette tokens and goes to one of the tables，where the players gaze at him with disbelief.
他把所有的金幣都換成了輪盤賭的籌碼，當(dāng)他走到一個(gè)輪盤賭的桌子前，所有的人都用懷疑的目光看著他。
The deep voice says: 27!
那個(gè)低沉的聲音又說:“二十七!”
He takes the whole pile and drops it at the 27. The table nearly bursts.Everybody is quiet when the croupier throws the ball. The ball stays at the 26.
他把所有的籌碼都壓在了二十七上。那個(gè)賭桌都快放不下了。當(dāng)那個(gè)球在輪盤賭上轉(zhuǎn)動(dòng)時(shí)每個(gè)人都安靜了下來。最后，它停在了二十六上。
Finally, the deep voice says: This is called BAD LUCK ! My son!
最終，那個(gè)低沉的聲音說:“我的孩子，這就叫做‘倒霉’!”
外國經(jīng)典幽默笑話：誰是喬治•華盛頓
有一位老師問了一個(gè)學(xué)生很多問題，但那個(gè)學(xué)生一個(gè)問題也回答不上來。于是，老師決定問他一些非常簡單的問題，使他能答對幾個(gè)。
A teacher was asking a student a lot of question，but the student couldn’t answer any of them. The teacher then decided to ask him some very easy question so that he could get a few right.
她說:“班克·希爾是什么?”
"What was Banker Hill?" She said.
這位學(xué)生想了一會(huì)，然后回答:“一個(gè)飛機(jī)場?”
The student thought for some time and then answered，"an airport?"
老師說:“不!是一場戰(zhàn)役!”她有點(diǎn)生氣了，但是她還是盡量不表現(xiàn)出來。接著，她問道:“美國的第一任總統(tǒng)是誰?”
"No, it was a battle," the teacher said. She was getting a little angry now, but she was trying not to show it. Then she asked，"Who was the first President of the United States? "
這位學(xué)生想了好長的一段時(shí)間，但還是一言不發(fā)。老師非常生氣，大聲喊道:“喬治·華盛頓!”學(xué)生站了起來，開始走回自己的座位。
The student thought for a long time, but didn't say anything. Then the teacher got very angry and shouted，"George Washington!" the student got up and began to walk towards his seat.
老師說:“回來!我沒叫你回去!”
"Come back!" the teacher said. "I didn’t tell you're to go."
這位學(xué)生說:“哦，對不起!我以為你叫下一位學(xué)生呢!”
"Oh，I'sorry ," the student said，"I thought you called the next studen疲倦:大便時(shí)不知不覺就睡著了。 值得:在旅游景點(diǎn)的公廁大便時(shí)花了五毛錢。 節(jié)水:在樹林里大便。 羅嗦:拉完了站起來,站起來又想拉。 余威:你從衛(wèi)生間出來后,八小時(shí)內(nèi)無人敢再進(jìn)。 結(jié)巴:拉兔子屎。 爽快:一錘定音。 細(xì)心:沖水之前先用棍子敲碎。 怯場:比賽之前總想去大便。 分享:開著門大便。 狂喜:便秘持續(xù)四天之后一瀉為快的感受。 靈巧:能及時(shí)避開馬桶里濺起來的水。 賣力:青筋暴露,雙頰發(fā)紫,全身發(fā)抖。 鬧鬼:感覺拉出來了,衛(wèi)生紙上分明還有痕跡,但馬桶里卻什么也看不見。 精明:從不占用下班時(shí)間大便。 習(xí)慣:每天都很準(zhǔn)點(diǎn),到時(shí)間必須大便。 飄忽:拉不出來,但又總覺得有。 幸運(yùn):馬桶底部留下類似急剎車的痕跡。 不幸:褲子脫下來之前已經(jīng)結(jié)束。 干凈:不管怎么擦,衛(wèi)生紙上都留不下東西。 賣弄:沖水之前一定要讓大家去參觀。 幽靈:馬桶里有大便,但誰也沒去過衛(wèi)生間。 勇氣:鬧肚子的時(shí)候嘗試著放屁。 淘氣:一邊大便一邊畫海螺。 風(fēng)險(xiǎn):第一次沖水,馬桶裝滿,還沖不沖第二次? 虛偽:好像是在大便,實(shí)際上連屁也沒放一個(gè)。 遠(yuǎn)見:吃完瀉藥后立刻備足卷紙坐到馬桶上。 著急:一家三口全鬧肚子,但衛(wèi)生間只有一個(gè)。 頑固:老是浮在水面上,怎么沖都沖不走。 突然:在沒有任何心理準(zhǔn)備的情況下大便,如:放屁時(shí),做直腸檢查時(shí),與愛侶親熱時(shí)…… 浪漫:沒有音樂和咖啡就無法大便。 直率:從大便能看出昨天吃的是什么。 排場:每次大便之前必先放三個(gè)響屁。 自卑:擦了整整一卷紙,但還是覺得沒擦干凈。【外國經(jīng)典幽默笑話】相關(guān)文章：
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